Programmer by Day

from the peanut gallery...

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HR Manager

A highly successful Human Resources Manager was tragically knocked down by
a bus and was killed. Her soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, where St.Peter
welcomed her.

"Before you get settled in" he said, "We have a little problem...you see,
we've never had a Human Resources Manager make it this far before and
we're not really sure what to do with you."
"Oh, I see," said the woman, "Can't you just let me in?"
"Well, I'd like to," said St Peter, "But I have higher orders. We're
instructed to let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven, and then you
are to choose where you'd like to go for all eternity."
"Actually, I think I'd prefer Heaven", said the woman.
"Sorry, we have rules..." at which St. Peter put the HR Manager into the
downward bound elevator. As the doors opened in Hell she stepped out onto
a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club; around her
were many friends... past fellow executives, all smartly dressed happy,
and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks,
and they talked about old times. They played a perfect round of golf and
afterwards went to the country club where she enjoyed a superb steak and
lobster dinner. She met the Devil (who was actually rather nice) and she
had a wonderful night telling jokes and dancing. Before she knew it, it
was time to leave. Everyone shook her hand and waved goodbye as she
stepped into the elevator. The elevator went back up to Heaven where St.
Peter was waiting for her.
"Now it's time to spend a day in Heaven," he said.
So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds, playing the harp
and singing... which was almost as enjoyable as her day in Hell. At the
day's end St. Peter returned. "So," he said, "You've spent a day in Hell
and you've spent a day in Heaven". "You must choose between the two."
The woman thought for a second and replied, "Well, Heaven is certainly
lovely, but I actually had a better time in Hell. I choose Hell."
Accordingly, St. Peter took her to the elevator again and she went back
down to Hell. When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself
standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her
friends dressed in rags, picking up rubbish and putting it in old sacks.
The Devil approached and put his arm around her.
"I don't understand," stuttered the HR Manager, "Yesterday I was here,
and there was a golf course, and a country club. We ate lobster, and we
danced and had a wonderful happy time. Now all there is, is just a dirty
wasteland of garbage and all my friends look miserable."
The Devil simply looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting
you, today you're staff."